imthejb

“We’re so bad at sex and then we wonder why women aren’t like, really aggressive about sex. We think it’s cause they don’t have as much desire as we do. That’s how stupid men are, that we think ‘they’re just weird, women are like fucked up in the head cause they don’t wanna just fuck all the time. If I was a women, I’d just fuck everybody. Why don’t they wanna fuck all the time? I do’. Of course you do, cause when you fuck, you get to fuck a woman! When she fucks, she has to fuck a guy! Wildly different experiences. For a man, 100% of the time, it’s the greatest thing that ever happened in his entire life. For a woman, about 40% of the time, when she’s being fucked by a guy, she’s thinking ‘I’ll get over this in a week. It’s not the worst thing. I’m not gonna cry this time’


“Another thing that proves how bad men are at sex is that after sex, you’re looking at two very different people. The man just wants to lay there, be cool and the woman wants to cuddle…’Why is she so NEEDY?’ She’s not needy you idiot, she’s horny, because you did nothing for her. YOU DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. HER PUSSY IS ON FIRE BECAUSE IT’S GONE UNFUCKED COMPLETELY. Of course you’re fine, you climbed on and went “KFHGSKG” and rolled off. And she’s on you because she’s like ‘WH-at SOMETHING ELSE HAS TO HAPPEN, THIS IS BULLSHIT!!” If you fuck a woman well, she will LEAVE YOU ALONE. ‘Thanks a lot buddy, zzzzz’”

Oh, Louis CK, advocate for the female orgasm.  (via stfumadison)
animalstalkinginallcaps
animalstalkinginallcaps:

WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M A “ONE-UPPER”?
I MEAN THAT YOU EXAGGERATE OR OUTRIGHT LIE, NOT ONLY TO MAKE YOURSELF SEEM FAR MORE INTERESTING THAN YOU ACTUALLY ARE, BUT ALSO OUT OF A MISGUIDED SPIRIT OF COMPETITIVENESS AND/OR ENVY. THAT YOU WILL NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO JUST ENJOY SOMEONE ELSE’S EXPERIENCES AND ACCOMPLISHMENTS BECAUSE IT ERRONEOUSLY MAKES YOU FEEL INFERIOR, SO YOU FABRICATE WIDLY IMPROBABLE TALES TO SUIT YOUR NEED FOR SITUATIONAL DOMINANCE. THAT IS WHAT I MEAN BY THAT.
I DON’T DO THAT.
I’D ARGUE, BUT I HAVE A DATE AT 5:30 AND I NEED TO GET READY.
WELL THAT’S FINE WITH ME, BECAUSE I HAVE TWO DATES AT 5:30.

animalstalkinginallcaps:

WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M A “ONE-UPPER”?

I MEAN THAT YOU EXAGGERATE OR OUTRIGHT LIE, NOT ONLY TO MAKE YOURSELF SEEM FAR MORE INTERESTING THAN YOU ACTUALLY ARE, BUT ALSO OUT OF A MISGUIDED SPIRIT OF COMPETITIVENESS AND/OR ENVY. THAT YOU WILL NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO JUST ENJOY SOMEONE ELSE’S EXPERIENCES AND ACCOMPLISHMENTS BECAUSE IT ERRONEOUSLY MAKES YOU FEEL INFERIOR, SO YOU FABRICATE WIDLY IMPROBABLE TALES TO SUIT YOUR NEED FOR SITUATIONAL DOMINANCE. THAT IS WHAT I MEAN BY THAT.

I DON’T DO THAT.

I’D ARGUE, BUT I HAVE A DATE AT 5:30 AND I NEED TO GET READY.

WELL THAT’S FINE WITH ME, BECAUSE I HAVE TWO DATES AT 5:30.

imthejb

niki-van-awesome:

spring-loaded-jesus-candles:

fireghostshigher:

A quick PSA, because working in a New Age store I realize a lot of people don’t know this.  Keep in mind this is the simple version.

The fella on the left-hand side, that’s Gautama Buddha, the Buddha, the central figure in Buddhism.  Note that he is not considered a god, but a teacher and spiritual leader, the first to attain Enlightenment in his era.  Note also how thin he is.  This is because the Buddha fasted a lot.  He was born Siddhartha Gautama.  Buddha is a title, and not actually his name.

The fella on the right-hand side is not Buddha.  This is a common misconception in the West.  That is Hotai (or Budai or Hotei depending on the language), a Buddhist monk from China and folkloric hero.  Hotai is thought by many to be a Buddha, but he is not the Buddha.  Unlike Buddha, Hotai actually is revered as a god in Chinese folklore, although not in Buddhist practice.

This post is based on things I’ve been taught by my Buddhist coworker but if I forgot or mixed up something important and you are Buddhist and you notice, please let me know.

This has been an informational post.  Have a nice day.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD EVERYONE READ THIS. READ IT. LEARN IT. PREACH IT.

I AM SO TIRED OF EVERYONE BELIEVING THIS MISCONCEPTION.

Sri Lanka’s primary religion is Buddhism. Go there and you’ll see huge, multiple-storey statues of the dude on the left everywhere.